In which half term whizzes by and I learn how to change shutter speed.

Well what a busy time we have had here in the house of wild bears. I have worked a full week (!) and so W has had the bears for five days straight. They all appear to have had a splendid time while I was gone- I am feeling somewhat un-needed.

In the latter part of the week we went up to visit W's parents and had a splendid time with W's sister and her family too. We went to BeWILDerwood, a low-tech, treehouse, big slide, climbing, zip-wire place and let the bears (my four plus three cousins) go wild. I wish they had had places like that when I was small!

We also made willow lanterns while we were there. It was a great example of competitive dad syndrome in action, you know, lots of middle class dads fabricating wicker men from twigs, masking tape and white tissue paper. Hilarious! We went for a much simpler option and made pyramids. Then, having made six, we decided to forgo the tissue paper application. The bears did not mind, and the lanterns looked great anyway:

The next day Papa and Toot threw the bears a hallowe'en party and I disovered how to change the shutter speed on my new camera. I took some ghostly pictures and am quite pleased with myself:

This last weekend of half term we are back at home because Mouse has two birthday parties to go to. I walked her to the first one and squirrelled away this snippet of our conversation for posterity:

Mouse: So Mummy, does Aunty Rita live in India?

Me, somewhat perplexed: Erm, why do you think she lives in India?

Mouse: Well I have this book with Aunty Rita in it and it is a story from India.

Me, thinking furiously: No, still no clue Mouse.

Mouse, as if I am stupid: You know Mummy! It has flying monkeys and a bad man with lots of arms.

Me, not entirely enlightened: Do you mean Rama and Sita, Mouse?

Mouse, pleased: YES! Oh...only it is not Aunty Sita is it? Anyway, does Aunty Rita live in India? Because, you know, she does live over the sea.

Me: Erm. She lives in Kent.

***

Anyway, there you have it, another week flies by and tomorrow heralds a return to The School Run, the supermarket and the unhappy knowledge that the house needs Cleaning Thoroughly. Still, got one more night of unashamed Christmas Cwafting (as it is known in these parts) and Sunday night lounging. Must dash...

x

Sunday

I have been up for precisely two hours and three minutes. My lovely husband got up and went for a bike ride, the bears got up and FHB made them all a drink and put the telly on. And I got a Lie In! Since I got up:

::There has been a hot chocolate/magazine incident.

::Miss T has eaten all her dad's breakfast.

::Custard has had a tantrum of astronomic proportions during which Miss T escaped onto the road, then W and Miss T escaped to Tesco; there was some concern over whether Custard had broken the front door; then I joined in and lost my temper too.

::Someone has been discovered to have scrunched up all yesterday's clean laundry and wiped it around the floor. I lost my temper.

::The three biggest bears have been paying a game involving lots of light sabre noises (but no actual light sabres- they are still under embargo on the top of the wardrobe). The boys appear to have fabricated faux lightsabres from a small plastic tube and a pair of Sportacus sunglasses. Mouse is running around waving a small pink castle. During said game, a large blue plastic box full of Stuff To Go Upstairs was kicked down the stairs. This resulted in a Glitter Mishap.
They bears did not tell me about the Glitter Mishap until they had tried to clean it up. With wet wipes. The top stair now looks most unfortunate, and who knew that purple fairy dust went brown when wet? And...I did not lose my temper. I have reached a point of resignation.

I am off to work again this afternoon, and am going armed with my baby jumper:

Looks weird doesn't it? All will be revealed...

x

Bike versus car

Custard: Are you going to bring your bike to get me or are you going to bring the car?

Me: Custard, I am getting you now. Do you think I have the bike or the car?

Custard (Standing on the bike): The car.

Me: The car?

Custard: Ha ha. Can I have some chocolate now?


x

This week I have been mostly...

Wondering...

::Why my children can not eat with knives and forks. Or spoons. Chopsticks would do. Any sort of culinary implement that would mean I did not have to watch them pick their food apart with their fingers and examine every mouthful before deciding whether to consume it.

::Why Mouse allows us to get as far away from a public toilet as humanly possible before saying that she needs a poo.

::Why Miss T cannot learn to say anything positive. Today's Give it back does not count. She is steadfastly refusing to say Daddy too, which is winding up W: Say Dad. Say Daddy. Go on...Daddy...Dad-dy. No, I am NOT Mum. Say Dad... and so on.

Being irritated:

::I see no reason at all why it would be acceptable to squash a punnet of grapes in my armchair. Twice.

::I do not understand why the bears refuse to eat on any given day, especially when it something they have eaten many times before, and it is healthy, homemade and tasty.

::Even when he is wearing reins Custard still manages to escape from me. How is this actually possible?

::Dog poo.Walking to school is like running the gauntlet in that department. I am watching out for eight feet and four wheels. People of Essex- clear up after your animals!

Planning:

::Christmas makes- for my bears and other little ones I love; to decorate the house; to put in my family Secret Santa bag.

::Crochet projects- for me, for W, for a few new babies.

Dancing:

::In the kitchen, with my bears, to whatever they fancy- FHB favours Katy Perry and 70s disco; Mouse will dance to anything; Custard likes the Theme from Star Wars and Scissor Sisters; Miss T likes 'I like to move it' from the Madagascar films.

::In the car (as much as you can) and shouting along to old school rock. I have been rediscovering Meatloaf, Skid Row and other sounds from my youth. Love it!

Crocheting:

::I frogged the baby jumper- truly I was never going to concentrate enough to complete an aran jumper, even a tiny one. I found a fab pattern on Ravelry instead and have whizzed through. More of that to come...

Enjoying:

::Time with my bears on the beach. Sometimes an unplanned trip is just what you need, so today, even though everyone was tired and it was frankly a bit chilly, we piled in the car after school and hit the beach.

Cadburys caramel nibbles- oh yes!

Then Mouse needed the loo and Miss T went blue, so we came home.

x

Small Pleasures

It is a grey Tuesday, there is a definate chill in the air and we are not quite in half term yet. The bears are all ridiculously tired and all looking rather peaky, W looks exhausted and I am feeling decidedly under the weather- not quite ill, but certainly not feeling great. We are having a Quiet Week.

I have listened to an awful lot of I hate you Mummy, a fair bit of It wasn't me, it was him (loudly, from various sources), far too much Am I going to nursery for a short time or a long time? How can you leave me? You must not go! It is just a short time isn't it? I CAN NOT WALK! and a lot of Go Away! Mine!

:: I made some cakes to cheer us all up, but used too much peanut butter and not enough jam, and now none of the bears will eat them.
::I have a mouth ulcer the size of Mount Vesuvius which is making my whole head hurt.
::And I have just wrenched my hip by hooking Miss T round the waist with my foot, whilst holding a huge basket of laundry and teetering on the top of the stairs, in order to prevent her from rolling head first down the stairs. Ow.
::And, goodness me but I'm hungry. One unloved muffin and a banana does not cut the mustard for breakfast, but I am really am limited to soft food at the moment- how tragic is that?

Anyway, it is on days like this that I try to make myself think of the Good Moments:

Mouse, Custard and Miss T with a really big box. (You would not believe how small the item that arrived in the box was!) Mouse would only let Custard in if he called himself Duke. (?!)

Miss T's new lounge suit. I found it in a charity shop at the weekend. It's velour and much too big for her, but it really makes me laugh. She is channelling one of her great-grandmothers in this get-up. All she needs is some spangly diamante.

My new hat and mitts. I made them yesterday and am excessively pleased with them. Not least because the hat is quite slouchy and makes me look about ten years younger, which can only be a Good Thing.
The mitts look a bit clunky, but I made up the pattern as I was going along. Every winter I go through about four pairs of gloves- they take a lot of bashing with all the buggy pushing I do. So I made these with reinforced thumb gussets(!) and we'll see how we go. At least they only took a couple of hours to make.

Am definately running out of steam now, so it must be coffee and paracetomol o'clock,

x

All is quiet...

It has been a quiet and peaceful week here in the land of the wild bears. Since parents evening we have all been making a big effort to behave ourselves- less shouting, more being patient, kind and pleasant to each other. Goodness me the house is a far more enjoyable place to be!
We asked FHB to write his class rules on the board in our kitchen and now whenever anyone is not behaving themselves we stop and ask whether we are following The Rules:

In addition, as my exam is OVER (!) I feel as if I am back in the building again, available to entertain, pay attention to, and even feed my kids. It has been lovely all round I think. We have made bead necklaces:

This was a birthday present to Mouse from her best friend, but, bless them, the boys wanted to make necklaces too. So we did.

And we've made flowers. Another Mouse gift, with glue this time! She and Custard had a lot of fun building these and she has put them proudly on her bedside table. I suggested the bookshelf in the living room so I could look at them too because they do make me smile, but she said that they were hers and she wanted share them only with Bumby (her rabbit). So there you are.

I have spent my none mothering moments Reading (Oh how I have missed Books! Real ones, not text books! With a story and everything!) and as I had a Kindle for my birthday I have been gorging myself on a mixture of e-reading and hard copy books, three on the go at once, just like the old days. I have also found the time to finally make FHB's hat:

And have received rather a lot of gratifying comments about it from ladies of a certain age. It is the lion hat from Inside Crochet, Issue 6.

Here is Mouse's hat (my pattern, with most of a small snowball flower from Nicky Epstein):

And Custard's hat (Crochet today, September/October 09):

I am under orders to make some fangs and eyes for it now he has seen his brother's finished hat.

I have also started a baby jumper. Not for me!

And managed to replenish my homemade cards stock, fuelled by much rum and black and a very fine lamby dinner made by W.
So there you are, a quiet, enjoyable week. FHB is much nicer, my throat does not hurt as I am much quieter and a great deal less stressed, the bears are all playing games- no telly, no computer games, just good old fashioned low tech cards and fuzzy felt. So relaxing...

x

Anger management

A brief photo free blog today. I feel the need to unload.

Yesterday was parents evening. My beautiful Mouse came away with a glowing report. FHB did not do so well. Academically my son is doing splendidly, behaviourally he is - challenging, shall we say? I'd like to think he is just bored, but I do rather worry that I am breeding a sociopathic menace to society. Anyway, after a lot of discussion last night, during which we removed all his books from his bedroom 'because the reason I'm angry is because I'm tired, and I'm tired because I stay up all night reading', we decided on a couple of strategies for FHB.

1- A reward system. Obvious really, but easy to slip out of.
2- Making him write down 5 reasons why he is feeling angry. (This afternoon's reasons, following the Black Straw incident, were: I am tired. I read too much. I never sleep. I don't like sleep. I always read. Hmmmm).
3- Sending him to school with a pocket dinosaur. When he is angry he has to tell the pocket dinosaur all about it before being nasty to anyone. It seemed to work.

I am feeling very gloomy about it all, and trying very hard to put a positive spin on this.

Custard also took a pocket toy- a dinosaur, to talk to when he gets sad because I have left him. (Evil parent that I am).

Miss T has fallen head first off the kitchen table. But in a positive discovery, she can now say 'cheese', 'go away', 'it hurts' and 'arghhhh Mummy, come'.

Ah well, tomorrow's another day. Just got to get through swimming lessons...

x

Cat and Mouse

On Friday, with Custard and Miss T safely in the custody of my in-laws (Custard was sick 5 times in their car on the way- glad it was their car for a change), I sat down and did some serious revision. At lunchtime, complete with a serious case of brain-freeze, I collected Mouse and FHB from school and we headed down to the beach for hot donuts and hot chocolate.

It has to be said that while I missed my two babiest babies hugely, it was a great deal easier just taking two bears to the beach. FHB pretended to roll in:

and I got told off by a very elderly man who was concerned for FHB's welfare. I did tell him that I would indeed hop into the estuary to retrieve my son, should he roll in, but the boy is like a monkey- no chance of him rolling in unless he wanted to.

The council has finally repaired the cliff lift, so we had a trip in that too:

Then we went home and I made Stuff with Mouse. Well, Mouse made stuff and I threaded a needle for her and sewed on two buttons- she did everything else herself:

 



Look!!!!!!!!!!

I am just so proud of her! She has carried her little bag around all weekend and is very pleased with herself indeed.

And I feel all fired up and full of enthusiasm and ideas for things to make myself. Just got to get through this exam tomorrow afternoon!

x

Mouse's Big Birthday Bunting

I made Mouse this big old granny bunting for her birthday, just using up some scraps of cotton dk.

Here's the pattern, in UK terminology:

I used a 4mm hook.

Ch 41.

Tr in 4th ch from hook, tr in next ch, ch 1, skip next ch, *tr in each of next 3 ch**, ch 1, skip next ch*. Repeat to end from * to *. Finish at **.

Turn. SS along into 1st ch sp, *3tr in ch sp**, ch 1*. Repeat to end from * to *. Finish at **.

Keep going until you have only one cluster left, then fasten off.

Make as many triangles as you like.

To join:

Ch 20, sl st across top of triangle, ch 10, sl st across top of next triangle. After you have added all triangles, ch 20.

Turn, ch1, dc across (twice). Fasten off.

Ta daaa! You have big, easy peasy bunting, and your five year old will be very pleased!

x

Mouse is 5!

While I have been revising...revising...revising, Mouse has been busy turning five. She landed on our feet, all elbows and bony bottom, and squirmed around saying: Is it my birthday? It's my birthday isn't it? I am five now aren't I? I am five now, aren't I? Really five? Now? etc etc.

She was quite excited.

All the bears got dressed, teeth cleaned (!), and breakfasted in record time and then the important things were attended to- presents.
Mouse had a list of requirements for her birthday, and between all members of her loving and extended family, she had them all fulfilled:

Cash register- I would like a shop. And if I have a shop I will need something to put money in.
Money- If I have a shop I will need money to give to people. (I like the sound of Mouse's shop).
Food, tins, cakes- When I have a shop I will need something to sell.
Kettle- I have a tea set, but I cannot make tea without a kettle, can I?
Pots and Pans- And, if I am going to make tea I will need something to cook food in too, won't I?
Utensils- And I'll need something to stir the food with.
Sewing machine- (This one was Mouse's most important requirement. Much quivering anticipation involved)- If I have a sewing machine I will be able to do sewing with you Mummy, won't I? (Mumy tries very hard to look pleased). And I can make clothes! For dolls!

Girly list isn't it?
Anyway, Mouse is a happy girl and I have a date with her to make Stuff tomorrow on her new sewing machine. Got to be better than revision!

In the mean time she has been creating havoc in the living room with Custard and her shop/tea set:

Dancing to mamma Mia!

x

PS Do you know, I am really looking forward to making Stuff with my Mouse tomorrow? I am. I'm feeling all warm and bubbly because she wants to do it with me.

Gloomy

Well, our little family had a pretty good weekend. We went to london and played Guardians of the Museum in the British Museum. I forgot the camera, but I shall still cherish a few dear moments of the day:

Custard's face when he saw a real Dum Dum head (Easter Island statue) and asking periodically when we would have to fight the dark forces.

FHB saying that London 'is Real! And it's just so big!' on Regent Street as he looked up at all the shops with wide eyed wonder.

Mouse being content with whatever we did, as long as she got to buy something sparkly or some lipstick.

 Miss T trotting along on a string at the museum, just being thrilled in general.

FHB asking me questions about kings and queens as we stood looking at Buckingham Palace in the rain. I plundered my knowledge of Henry VIII, Queen Victoria (Were they married Mummy?), Oliver Cromwell (who was boring and cancelled Christmas and singing) and Prince Harry (But do we really make princes go to war now?).

Custard saying his best bit of the day was the staircase at Hamleys because it looked like Narnia.

I did not enjoy:

Hamleys on a Saturday afternoon with four bears and a buggy. Too busy, rubbish lifts and far too many miserable middle-aged people with no children in tow who kept shoving my baby out of the way. In particular the man who shut the lift doors on my buggy and the woman who kicked my buggy (with my baby in it).

The Jubilee line not running from Green Park, so we had to walk from Picadilly to Embankment at 6pm in the rain with exhausted children. W, bless him pushed the buggy with Miss T and Custard on it and carried Mouse on his shoulders while I alternately pulled and carried FHB along the Mall.

And so to today. It is a very mondayish Monday. It is drizzling. It is grey. The kids are grumpy. W is grumpy. I am grumpy.

FHB began the day sobbing that he was tired.

Me: Why sweetie?

FHB: Well, because at night I read lots of books instead of going to sleep. When you and Daddy come upstairs I hide them under the covers and pretend to sleep. But really I am awake and I read at least twenty Asterix books a night (Slightly hysterical).

We agree that we should remove all books from his room so he does not feel compelled to read them all every night.

In other glorious Monday news:

Custard wants to kill me (not unusual); Mouse is giving me headache because she is shrieking like a fishwife (I am NOT a FISHWIFE! Me: You've just proved it); She also hates me, apparently.

And I have broken my favourite mug:

I thought I was putting it on the coffee table, but was actually placing it on a piece of thin air about a foot from the coffee table. Not. Happy. And it was half full of coffee at the time.

Anyway. Things must improve. I am in the last stretch of my course- my exam is on Monday. I cannot wait for it to be over so I can get on with making lots of lovely things. I am going to sleep at night dreaming of hats and bunting and goodies I want to make for Christmas.

x

PS Since I drafted this I have done another school run and can add one nose-to-nose shouting match with a three year old; a mile long walk with Mouse repeatedly making a small toy cicada buzz (I threaten to shove it down the nearest drain); one escapee being returned, sobbing, by a friend of mine, from the main road while I was still in school (again); one edifying dog-poo episode (FHB) and subsequent loss of temper (me); one more fishwifely interlude; and my karma biting me on the bum and making me lose my voice, to my list of happiness and delight for the day.

On a brighter note, FHB is wearing a pirate flag as a Roman toga, which is desperately sweet, and Miss T is dressed as Sportacus. And, while hosing down the dog-poo-shoes, I noticed a handful of late, ripe raspberries nestling in the border. All Mine!